Where I am today in this moment…

N.0805.Yesterday

For what ever reason right now at this moment I am overtaken with a feeling that cries out to the world…I am here! I am here today; that is a gift. There are days I wake up and there s such a struggle to move forward, to get past the weight of past circumstances or beliefs and then there are days where you know deep down there is a change coming.

A Mark Twain quote keeps filling my head:
“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.”

And today as I was reading a book this quote by Natasha Brown resonated:
“I’ve learned that if you have a power, you are obligated to use it.”

I wish I could say that today I have found these things and suddenly know exactly what to do, but I can’t. What I can say is that when I ask myself these potent questions my mind explodes with emotion and joy and to some extent…terror.

This has been a year of asking myself what I want, not what do I think I want or what should I do, but what do I want and who do I want to be as I go through this life. These are harder questions than we think because once you answer them there is an obligation to make it happen. A contract with yourself that you can no longer avoid signing. A contract that has blank lines to be filled in at a later date and that takes courage. I don’t always believe I have that kind of courage, but I can tell you I know it would be in the contract.

These days I ask myself what my true values are and if the choices I make are in line. Sometimes yes and sometimes no, however I’ll admit I haven’t signed that contract yet. I’m waiting for something, an answer of some sort and I have no idea what it is, but I have to believe it will come. Until then, well…I’m working on it. I suppose that’s the important part.

Nichole Donjé

Advertisements

Author: Finding True North

Nichole Donje is a interdisciplinary artist, activist and leader. A philosopher and self-exploration addict, Nichole is currently working on two books of art and poetry FINDING TRUE NORTH and LIFE POEMS. She is a visual artist and photographer. Nichole founded and ran the highly regarded New York City based independent theatre company TAPT/The Artist’s Playground Theatre, from 2006-2016. Serving as TAPT’s Artistic Director, Nichole worked diligently to support new and forgotten works that help shape the way we view the world around us. A recognized leader, Nichole served three terms as Vice President of the Board of Directors for The Players and currently served on the Executive Committee. The Players is the oldest theatrical club in the country founded by such luminaries as Edwin Booth and Mark Twain "for the promotion of social intercourse between the representative members of the dramatic profession and the kindred professions of literature, painting, sculpture and music, and the patrons of the arts". A key influencer of the Players current revitalization she has become an advocate for the art and livelihood of a social club. The Players not only honors yesterday’s and today’s luminaries of the performing arts, but also brings back the forgotten art of face to face relationships. Nichole is a member of SAG-AFTRA, LPTW/League of Professional Theatre Women, LeanInNYC, and The Players.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s